Existential Crisis: When Life’s Questions Feel Too Heavy
Have you ever stared at the ceiling at 2 a.m. and thought — “What’s the point of all this?”
That quiet, unsettling moment where your achievements, routines, and even relationships suddenly feel hollow — that’s the beginning of an existential crisis.
It’s not madness. It’s not weakness.
It’s the mind awakening to deeper questions — about meaning, purpose, and the very nature of being.
What Is an Existential Crisis?
An existential crisis occurs when you start questioning the fundamental meaning of your life — your goals, identity, and place in the world. It often feels like falling into a psychological fog where even everyday tasks lose their sense of relevance.
Psychologists trace this state back to existentialist philosophy, led by thinkers like Søren Kierkegaard, Friedrich Nietzsche, Jean-Paul Sartre, and Viktor Frankl — who believed that confronting life’s uncertainty is an inevitable part of human growth.
Frankl, a Holocaust survivor and psychiatrist, famously said:
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.”
In short, an existential crisis isn’t a breakdown — it’s a turning point.
Common Triggers
An existential crisis can strike at any stage of life, but it’s often sparked by transition, loss, or uncertainty.
- Major life changes: Graduation, career shifts, marriage, parenthood, retirement
- Loss: Death of a loved one, breakup, or health diagnosis
- Burnout: When constant productivity leaves you emotionally drained
- Global events: Pandemics, wars, environmental worries — anything that shakes your sense of stability
- Spiritual emptiness: When rituals feel routine, and you long for deeper connection
Sometimes, it arrives quietly — not as tragedy, but as an internal whisper: “Is this really the life I want?”
How It Feels Inside
An existential crisis is not dramatic; it’s often quiet, heavy, and invisible.
You might notice:
- A feeling of emptiness or disconnection
- Loss of motivation or joy in things you once loved
- Constant questioning — “Why am I doing this?”
- Sleep disturbances, anxiety, or irritability
- Emotional numbness or hypersensitivity
- A longing for authenticity — wanting life to feel real again
The Science Behind the Struggle
From a psychological viewpoint, this is the mind’s attempt to integrate meaning and identity.
Brain imaging studies show that intense reflection activates the default mode network, the region linked to self-awareness and introspection.
Prolonged stress in this network can increase cortisol, leading to fatigue and low mood — which is why existential anxiety can mimic depression.
However, psychologists like Irvin Yalom emphasize that existential distress is not an illness but a sign of awakening consciousness. It’s your inner self demanding alignment — between how you live and what you truly value.
Steps to Move Through an Existential Crisis
1. Don’t Rush to Fix It — Sit With It
Resist the urge to escape the discomfort. Meaning often emerges through patience, not panic.
Journal your questions. Let them unfold slowly.
2. Reconnect With the Present
When your mind spirals into “big questions,” anchor yourself in small realities:
your breath, sunlight on your skin, the taste of your tea.
Mindfulness re-grounds your awareness in what is, rather than what’s missing.
3. Find Meaning Through Creation or Service
Purpose isn’t always found in answers — often, it’s built through contribution.
Create something. Help someone. Volunteer. Teach.
Action gives shape to your thoughts.
4. Explore Spiritual or Philosophical Reflection
Whether through meditation, reading, or prayer, reconnect with something larger than yourself.
Spirituality — religious or not — often restores a sense of belonging to the vastness of life.
5. Seek Support
Talk to a counsellor, therapist, or mentor familiar with existential therapy.
Professional guidance can help you navigate this psychological crossroad with compassion and clarity.
6. Re-author Your Story
Ask:
“If I stripped away society’s expectations, what would make my life feel meaningful?”
Sometimes, the crisis isn’t about losing meaning — it’s about shedding borrowed definitions of it.
What Awaits on the Other Side
Emerging from an existential crisis doesn’t mean having all the answers — it means learning to live with the questions.
You begin to experience a quieter strength —
- Contentment in simple moments
- Appreciation of impermanence
- Confidence in your own path, however uncertain
As Rainer Maria Rilke wrote:
“Be patient toward all that is unsolved in your heart and try to love the questions themselves.”
At Nellikka.life, we see mental health and existential wellness as interconnected.
Your mind, body, and purpose are one system — when one is out of sync, all feel it.
So instead of fearing existential questions, honour them.
They are life’s way of nudging you closer to authenticity, presence, and truth.
